rawpixel.com
In November of 2022, the San Marcos High School Theatre Department attended the Texas Thespian Festival in Grapevine. The Texas Thespian Festival holds multiple events every year, inviting students from middle school to high school to these various events to compete in categories including improv, musical theatre, and more. It offers a number of workshops the actors can attend that will teach them new things about acting, and overall, make them better at their craft. Among these students was national qualifying playwright actor Ruby Wilsford, a junior attending the festival for the first time.
What Ruby lacked in dialogue that scored her a 3 in her comedic one-act play, she made up for incredibly in character development, structure, and originality, receiving top marks all throughout. Ruby’s high scores led her to be eligible to qualify for the national conference that would be held in Indiana.
‘No More Thanks To Give’ follows the story of a very dysfunctional family on Thanksgiving Day. Their interactions with each other and the situation they are thrown into paint the hardships and laughs that can occur during the holiday season. Below is the final copy of her play that was submitted to the festival.
ACT I
Scene 1
Thanksgiving. Dusk.
(Lights up on stage, table set with cutlery surrounded by five chairs. ROXANNE enters with a pan of food fresh from the oven and sets it on the table. As she adjusts some plates, MAE is chased in by TRISTAN who is half dressed.)
TRISTAN
You really think you can run from me Mae? You can barely run to the fridge for your next snack!
MAE
(Mockingly) Ohhhh I’m Tristan Howell and I found the only girl in a hundred miles who will date me. You can drop the act, even without her prescription glasses Nan could see that Alya is only with you for your looks. It’s not like you have much of a personality.
(TRISTAN lunges across the table knocking off a plate.)
ROXANNE
That is enough! Mae give your brother his phone or so help me I will turn off the internet until you both go back to school.
TRISTAN
You can’t punish me because she’s decided that her core personality is annoying the crap out of me!
ROXANNE
Language! And I am your mother, I can punish whoever I please. Especially my son who seems to think that it’s okay to run in my dining room half dressed and break my good plates. The ones I got as a wedding gift! Now I expect you both to be dressed in your Sunday best within the next ten minutes. Your father is almost here and I would prefer him to think that I have not completely lost control of this house. Do you both understand?
MAE
Yes ma’am.
TRISTAN
Whatever.
ROXANNE
Good. Good. Everything is GOOD!
(ROXANNE exits.)
MAE
She’s only going to get worse once they get here.
TRISTAN
Can you ever shut your mouth? I’ve been living with her longer than you have Mae, I know what’s going to happen.
MAE
Don’t be a smart ass. Not that you can be one. The only time I’ve ever seen an A on your report card was third grade when social skills were still a subject. You’re lucky that you follow after dad in that category.
TRISTAN
What’s that supposed to mean?
MAE
It means you’re a people pleaser Tristan. All you ever do is what people want you to, and you can’t even do that properly.
TRISTAN
Don’t act like you’re any better than me! Dad leaves and you become so… so… contumelious.
MAE
You don’t even know what that word means!
TRISTAN
I do too!
(ROXANNE enters with a broom and plate)
ROXANNE
Are you kidding me! Both of you get dressed. Now!
(Doorbell rings. TRISTAN and MAE exit. Roxanne sweeps shards offstage then opens the door to reveal NAN, PHILIP, and OLIVER)
ROXANNE
Come in! Come in!
NAN
Anne! How are you, dear? You don’t look so good, have you been getting some rest?
PHILIP
Mom please.
NAN
She is the mother of your children Philip! You should be more worried about her health. Look at her eye bags and the dead ends of her hair. Those beady eyes. The weight she’s put on. I’ve seen corpses in better shape than this.
PHILIP
Don’t compare her to a corpse.
NAN
Why not? You don’t get to my age without seeing more than a few bodies! Sarah died last month and looked like an angel, though she acted like the devil, and Anne’s here looking like a college freshman during orientation week.
ROXANNE
Thank you Nan. It’s always so wonderful to hear your opinions on me.
NAN
No problem dear.
OLIVER
Roxanne. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.
ROXANNE
I wish I could say the same. Oliver, right?
OLIVER
I know you don’t like me, but I’m glad to be here. You seem like a lovely person and I’m excited to meet Philip’s kids. Thank you so much for giving me this chance.
ROXANNE
Giving you this chance? I didn’t invite you!
PHILIP
Roxanne, can you please be civil?
ROXANNE
No Philip. I cannot. Especially when you bring your boy toy to our family dinner.
PHILIP
Can you not act foul for five minutes! There’s a reason I chose-
MAE
Dad!
PHILIP
April! How’s my favorite daughter doing? You look so grown in your dress.
ROXANNE
She better. It took an hour to corral her into it.
MAE
I told you not to call me that!
PHILIP
(Hands flowers to Mae) But April showers bring Mae flowers!
TRISTAN
Hey dad.
PHILIP
Tristan! I haven’t heard from you in a while, what’s been keeping you so busy?
ROXANNE
You haven’t heard from him because you don’t put in the effort to reach out.
PHILIP
Don’t act like you’re so much better than me Roxy. You put more effort into tormenting me than parenting our children!
TRISTAN
Mom. Dad. Please don’t-
ROXANNE
At least I’m trying to parent them! You run off to put your dick in the first thing that asks for it.
PHILIP
This is what I’m talking about! Using vulgar terms in front of them. It’s irresponsible and negligent.
OLIVER
Philip, darling, let’s not do this.
ROXANNE
Irresponsible is cheating on your wife with a man you’ve only known for seven months! Negligence is running off every Friday night and leaving me by myself! Get rid of your god complex, I’ve seen mice who were better parents than you.
MAE
Can you two stop it! Not even Tristan and I yell at each other this much. It’s so infuriating. Mom, you invited Dad, your ex husband, to your Thanksgiving dinner!
ROXANNE
He may be a cheating, low-life, horrible, disgusting, piece of scum pig but he is still your father.
MAE
Listen to yourself for two seconds! You knew he was going to bring Olvier to upset you and yet you still do this just to fight with him. At this point we may as well clear the room and have you duke it out.
PHILIP
I’d win.
ROXANNE
It’s funny you think like that when I’ve seen you cry over rain getting in your hair. How would you like it if I pulled it off your scalp and shoved it down your throat.
MAE
Shut up! Both of you shut your mouths.
TRISTAN
Mae –
MAE
Shuuuuuuut Uuuuup! The next person to say anything before I finish will be walking themselves outback and eating from the dog bowl! Dad, you are so unbearably obnoxious all the time! Everything is always about you. Thanksgiving? Oh let’s make it about me and the boyfriend. The very same boyfriend I caught you having sex with! That image is burned into my eyes and seeing his nasty face is not helping with that. And mom you are horrible towards him! I’m sorry he left you and that you’re miserable but I refuse to be as unhappy as you are all the time. Get over yourself, you weren’t very happy with him to begin with.
NAN
I wouldn’t be happy ether if your Papa acted half as stupid as your father.
MAE
Now we are all going to sit at that table and act like the happy family we once were. Because I am exhausted, hungry, and upset that I have to spend three hours with you all!
NAN
Well said! Shall we then?
OLIVER
Roxanne, there’s only five chairs.
ROXANNE
Oh. My bad. There used to be only five of us.
PHILIP
Don’t worry Olly. I’ve got you covered.
(PHILIP pulls OLIVER into his lap)
ROXANNE
Are you kidding me, Phil!? Our daughter just told you to stop this nonsense. But wait. The rules don’t apply to you. They never do!
MAE
I’m done!
(MAE exits)
TRISTON
Are you fucking kidding me!
ROXANNE
Language.
PHILIP
Watch your mouth.
TRISTON
Watching my mouth would be better than watching you fight. We get it you’re angry, upset, annoyed, spiteful, pitiful adults going through a divorce. But come on. Mae is so annoying that I taped pillows to my ears, you two just make me want to rip them off.
NAN
You two really screwed the pooch on this one.
TRISTON
They certainly screwed something! Not the things they were supposed to, right dad?
PHILIP
Triston please. Can we just-
TRISTON
No. We cannot. We can’t do anything anymore. Not as a family at least. Because you decided to bring him!
OLIVER
Hi.
TRISTON
Did I ask you to speak? My father may like you but I certainly do not.
(MAE enters with a bowl of dog food and dumps it on the table.)
MAE
Everybody still hungry? Good! Eat up.
OLIVER
I’ll make this easy for everyone. I’m leaving.
PHILIP
Oliver please, don’t go. I know Roxanne can be a lot but I really want you to be here.
OLIVER
It’s not Roxanne. It’s not the fact that your daughter poured dog food all over the food. It’s you.
NAN
It’s always his fault.
ROXANNE
Got that right.
PHILIP
Me? Really Oliver? I’ve tried to make tonight work.
TRISTON
Haven’t tried very hard.
OLIVER
No you haven’t! Mae was right. You are selfish, snobbish, egotistical, and you only care about how you can get people to like you. Not even highschoolers are this shallow.
PHILIP
Olly. I know tonight didn’t go as planned but we can work it out.
OLIVER
We can’t!
PHILIP
Why not? Why should their opinions matter?
OLIVER
Because I don’t want it to work out. I don’t want you and your pretentious attitude anymore.
MAE
Aww. The fool blinded by love gets a set of eyes.
PHILIP
No. No. NO! This is not how tonight was supposed to go. It was supposed to be you and me and the kids. A proper Thanksgiving.
OLIVER
You are a horrible person Philip. I’m done. It was nice to meet you all. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
(OLIVER exits)
ROXANNE
Doesn’t feel good to get dumped, does it?
PHILIP
Oh you know what Roxy-
NAN
I love a Thanksgiving drama. Don’t you Philip. Never liked him anyway, quite a sore in the eyes. Not that Anne is much better.
MAE
Nan, it’s time for your nap.
NAN
Don’t patronize me!
ROXANNE
Mae is right. Nan, go get yourself some rest. I’ll pack up the food and drop it off tomorrow morning. Philip. Get out of my house and don’t come back until you’re invited. Okay?
(ROXANNE guides PHILIP and NAN off stage)
NAN
We’ll see you all at Christmas. Right Philip?
PHILIP
Of course. I wouldn’t miss this for the world. It’s always fun to be around my ex-wife and my very rude children
MAE
Bye.
TRISTON
You really don’t have to come.
(PHILIP and NAN exit as MAE and TRISTON try to go)
ROXANNE
Oh no you don’t. Mae get that dog food off my table or that is your dinner for the rest of this week. Triston for the bad attitude you’ll be helping. Okay?
MAE
What! But-
ROXANNE
If there aren’t any objections. I will be taking a nap and recovering from your fathers visit. Everything better be spotless when I wake up.
TRISTON
This is your fault.
MAE
It’s always the youngest’s fault.
(BLACKOUT)
THE END